


The Marauders and the Impromptu Party

by byebyebluejay



Series: Mischief Managed: Marauding Stories [7]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Happy Birthday Remus, Hogwarts, M/M, Marauders Friendship, Marauders' Era, Pranks and Practical Jokes, light language and boyish attitude, mischief and mayhem, sirius likes rocky horror idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 19:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11720526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byebyebluejay/pseuds/byebyebluejay
Summary: It's Remus's birthday, but when a trip to a muggle party store yields disappointing results, Sirius, James and Peter decide to take matters into their own hands. Which turns out just about as well as can be expected.





	The Marauders and the Impromptu Party

A sudden burst of sound and color jarred Remus out of sleep. Disconcerted, half-blinded by the sun, he tried to scramble to his feet, felt something brush against his nose and eye, then fell headlong, legs tangled his bedsheets, into two sets of arms. 

“Happy birthday!” Peter said, and Remus, sweeping something papery off his face, squinted up at Peter, who had halfway caught him. Sirius, who also had an arm wrapped firmly around Remus’s middle, was not looking at him, though. Instead, he was focused on a small plastic object in his hand. 

“Was that it?” James asked, and Remus righted himself, heart still pounding as he unwound the bedsheets from his feet. 

“Looks like,” Sirius said, peering at the object and giving it a shake, and then, almost as an afterthought, “Happy birthday, Rem. Sorry that was so disappointing.” Remus’s heart was still racing along at a hundred beats per minute, and he wiped at his eyes with his fist. Sun was streaming in through the windows, half blinding him. Even so, he could make out the paper ribbons and little bits of plastic glitter littering his bed. 

“What the hell was that?” He asked thickly as Peter bent to help him disentangle himself from the sheets. 

“Not what we paid for,” James said, tossing aside the empty plastic shell of the party popper he had let off. It skittered across the floor and rolled under Peter’s bed. As Remus finally righted himself, pushing away from Peter and Sirius, Sirius’s eyes locked on him, and, with greatest solemnity, put his hands on Remus’s shoulders. 

“Rem. As the most mugglish—“

“That’s not a word.”

“—mugglicious—“

“Absolutely not,” said Remus, managing a smile that time. 

“—as the only non-pureblood in this dormitory, I’m calling on you to explain why these party poppers are so lackluster. I was led to believe by the packaging that there would be fireworks, and maybe music or something. But this is…” Sirius looked deflated as he studied the spent party popper. 

“Disappointing,” James supplied.

“They just made a little popping sound and shot out a bunch of this stuff,” Peter said, picking up one of the long strands of paper. 

“That’s how they work,” Remus said, “Were you expecting stuff from a muggle shop to be comparable to Filibuster Fireworks? Why not just go to Gambol and Japes?”

“We’ve done Filibuster Fireworks every year,” James said gloomily, “And we thought maybe these would be interesting, for a change. I mean, some muggle stuff is really cool. Padfoot has been telling me about the television at your house. Why did he get invited to watch that _Stony Horror Photo Show_ but not me or Peter?” 

Remus snorted with laughter, “It’s _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_. And you and Peter were both on holiday.”

“You two would love it,” Sirius said, vanishing his party popper and turning to James all in one smooth movement, draping his arms around James’s shoulders, “Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me! I wanna be dirty!” He sang in a slightly off-key falsetto, shimmying his head and shoulders, before grabbing James’s hands and pressing them firmly against his chest. Peter howled in laughter as James pushed Sirius backwards onto Remus’s bed, where he let himself sprawl, writhing licentiously. Remus feigned shielding his eyes with his hand, though honestly, seeing Sirius stretched out in his bed did do _something_ to him. There was a faint flutter in his stomach, seeing even affected desire in Sirius’s face. “Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me, creature of the night!” Sirius sang, before sitting upright, beaming, “What? Don’t like that one, Prongsy?”

“No. It’s a good one. Catchy. But Merlin, Sirius. Either close your legs or put some trousers on.” 

Laughing, Sirius sat up, bouncing off the bed and throwing his arms around Remus, dragging him into a tight hug, face pressed into his shoulder, “So, that was lame. What are we going to do now?” Like that, Remus could lean back into him, let Sirius support some of his weight. 

“Get breakfast, I suppose,” Remus said, scratching his head, “See if my parents sent me a present. I still can’t understand what you expected to get out of those poppers.” 

“I thought it might be sort of a party in a bottle,” said Peter, and James nodded.

“You know. The confetti, sure, but more of it, and music, and hats, and maybe sweets or something.”

“How would they get that all in there?” Remus asked. James shrugged. 

“Magic? Oh, right. Shit. I dunno. How do muggles do anything?”

“Elbow grease and innovation?” 

“We can’t just go down to breakfast,” Sirius said, apparently having ignored the last few seconds of conversation, “It’s your birthday, Moony. We have to do something fun.”

“I want to see if my parents sent me anything,” Remus said, reaching back to ruffle Sirius’s hair, “Then we can… I don’t know. Sneak out to Hogsmeade, visit Zonko’s, and get a drink at the Three Broomsticks? Does that sound alright?” 

“Sounds good to me!” Peter said.

“Anything you like Moony,” said Sirius, giving Remus a final squeeze before releasing him.

They ate sausage rolls with mugs of frothy Butterbeer at The Three Broomsticks, with Peter, Sirius and James marveling over the small golden Probity Probe that Remus had received for his birthday. 

“I bet we can scrounge up a few new secret passageways and stuff with that,” Sirius said, curling and uncurling a lock of hair around his finger, “Really cool, Moonbeam.”

“Put a few more finishing touches on the map,” James agreed, “While we work out a way to get the Room of Requirement on there.” 

“I still think that the ‘Cum and Go Room’ is a funnier name,” Sirius said, and Wormtail nearly choked on his drink despite himself. 

“Give it a rest with that stupid joke, Pads,” James said, and Sirius shrugged, grinning.

“Alright. For you, Prongs,” His grin faded, and he groaned, pushing back his chair onto two legs as he took a slow sip of Butterbeer, “I’m still disappointed about the party poppers. We really had pictured something with a lot more fanfare, Moony. I’m really sorry.”

“You terrified me out of my wits. I think anything more thrilling, and I might have accidentally hexed you.” 

“I guess it worked out alright, then!” said Peter. 

“Cheers, Moony,” James said, but Sirius didn’t look any happier. 

“I want a redo,” He said, setting his Butterbeer and his chair down, both a little too hard. The chair clunked loudly where it settled, making several other patrons of the pub start, and Butterbeer sloshed onto the table. That earned him a glare from Madam Rosmerta, “Whoops, sorry.” He siphoned up the spilled drink with a flick of his wand, before looked back at Remus again, eyes blazing, “Give us a month,” Sirius said, “One month. Then we can give you a proper party.”

Remus couldn’t help but laugh, “Sirius, honestly. I don’t want a party—whether that party involves being woken up with a loud noise very early, or a lot of Butterbeer and all of our classmates. This is enough. I’m happy. I promise.” But Sirius, evidently, wasn’t ready to let the matter go as easily as that. 

“Just give us a chance, okay? We’ll make it really great. We won’t startle you awake again. And it won’t be something where you have to do a lot of small-talk, if you’d rather. Please?”

“I don’t know, Sirius—“ Remus began, but Sirius pulled a heartbroken face, fingers finding their way to his hair and running through it fretfully, lower lip sticking out just a little.

“Give me a chance, Moonbeam. Let me throw you a party.” 

James laughed at the show, and Peter was grinning into his mug of Butterbeer, but Remus couldn’t help himself. Sirius was at least half faking it—he had to be—but still, if it meant enough to him that he wanted to put on a show, then… “Alright, Sirius. You can all get another go. But don’t spend too much time on it, or anything. It’s really not that big of a deal. I’m enjoying my day so far.” 

Sirius smiled toothily, and then reached over to grab him by the shoulders, pressing an enthusiastic kiss to his hair, “You won’t regret this, Moony!” He made eye contact with James, and something passed between the pair in that glance that Remus couldn’t parse. When they looked away from each other, though, James was smiling too, and Peter was looking as confused as Remus felt. 

Remus forgot about the promised party. Between O.W.L. prep, a Marauding night under the full moon and his subsequent recovery in the hospital wing, prefect duty and the Easter holiday, his mind was otherwise occupied. There was no change in the other three’s habits. As usual, James and Sirius traipsed around with Peter tagging along behind them once in a while, while Remus was otherwise occupied with homework or prefect duty or in the hospital wing. So, when April 10th dawned bright and breezy, and they went down to breakfast, Remus didn’t think much of the bulging pockets of James, Sirius and Peter’s robes.

He had sat down at the Gryffindor table and was helping himself to oatmeal and poached apples when Sirius looked across at James and quirked an eyebrow. James, already two slices of bacon into his breakfast, stared blankly back at him. Then, there was a sudden jolt, followed by a scraping of benches, and Remus remembered granting permission for a redo birthday celebration a month ago. Trepidation quickened his heart rate.

“Is this…?” 

“Happy birthday, Moony!” Sirius crowed, and he pulled something that looked like three fireworks bound together with Spello-tape out of his pocket. James and Peter were on their feet too, and then, within a fraction of a second of each other, they tugged the chords that dangled from the ends of the multi-barreled packets. A sound like a cannon blast shook the Great Hall, startling first years out of their seats and making Remus’s ears ring as the packets went off in quick succession. A burst of red and gold stars shot out from the three improvised crackers, showering down on Remus’s head, and the heads of half the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff tables to boot. Mary Macdonald upended her cup of pumpkin juice in her haste to get under the table. Beside her, Marlene was on her feet, mouth open with what looked like a shriek of laughter, but Remus couldn’t hear her over the voices that had risen up (not quite simultaneously) ten times magnified from the paper-wrapped tubes.

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Remus, happy birthday to you!” And then, as James, Sirius, and Peter’s magnified voices stopped reverberating in the rafters, and Remus was trying wade through his shock and find his voice again, the cardboard crackers exploded upward in a burst of Sherbet Lemons and Fizzing Whizbees, which pelted down like hail all around them. Remus could have sworn he heard a few fracture with the force of their collision with the ceiling. Half of the Great Hall was in chaos. Older students had either cast shield charms or recoiled from the confusion as the underclassmen alternately scrambled to collect the sweets, or else to hide from the projectiles. Remus, mouth agape, looked between his three best friends, who were all wearing slightly different versions of the same grin. It was almost unbelievable how much of a ruckus they were all willing to cause in the name of giving him a memorable birthday, and the sentiment that filled him was some combination of touched, amused, and annoyed because surely they were all going to get in an enormous amount of trouble for this. Still, he had started smiling too, and couldn’t manage to stop.

“When—“ But Remus was not permitted to finish his sentence, because sure enough, Professor McGonagall, summoning candies out of the air with broad sweeps of her wand so that she was orbited by a ring of them, was stalking towards them, looking venomous. 

“Black! Potter! Pettigrew! _Remus Lupin_!” She said his name with a particularly cold fury, and Remus, whose cheeks had been hurting because of how widely he was smiling, had to struggle to straighten his face, “My office. Now.” 

Putting the hubbub of the Great Hall behind him, bracketed by Sirius on his right side and James and Peter on the left, Remus followed Professor McGonagall. Sirius wrapped his arm around Remus’s waist, and leaned in to whisper in his ear.

“How was that?” He was still grinning, though his eyes were fixed on Professor McGonagall’s back, “I think people will be talking about that for at least a week or two. Don’t you?”

“I think we’ll be in enough trouble on our own without inspiring any copy-cats,” Remus whispered back, and Sirius snickered.

“How did you like it, though? We’ve been working on it during all of our spare time, sans you. Jammy and I worked on it during Easter, too. We dismembered about a dozen Filibuster Fireworks and Howlers. It’s not really an original product, but it got the job done. Loads better than muggle party poppers, I think.” Professor McGonagall was already ushering them into her office, so he and Sirius broke apart, Sirius’s arm slowly relinquishing Remus’s waist. There were only two chairs before her desk, but she conjured two more—wooden and straight-backed—before gesturing towards them. 

“Sit!” 

They sat, Peter shamefaced, James amused and Sirius tossing back the mermaid braid Lily had done for him and brushing a bit of ash off his robes, looking handsomely disheveled. Remus had a sneaking suspicion that Sirius would not be permitted to attend the next makeover night following this fiasco. Even if Marlene had enjoyed it, Mary and Lily almost certainly had not. He didn’t doubt people would talk about what had happened at breakfast, but somehow, Remus felt fairly confident their disruption would be met with mixed sentiments in the common room. Not everyone shared James and Sirius’s sense of humor. Professor McGonagall’s lips pressed together in a thin line as she looked between all of them. Remus folded his hands on his knees, doing his best to look contrite, considering the sharp annoyance in Professor McGonagall’s face. Nevertheless, he thought he saw just a trace of something more in Professor McGonagall’s eyes, or the twitch at the corner of her mouth. As though maybe, just maybe, she was a little bit impressed. In the next moment, it was gone, and she looked nothing short of exasperated. 

“I’m not sure what gave you four the impression that causing that sort of disruption over breakfast, when everyone is already on frayed nerves with exams approaching, was acceptable. And I can’t even begin to imagine where you got the time to engineer something like that when you should have been studying. But regardless, it was not acceptable. I wish I could say I expected better of you—Potter, Black, Pettigrew—but I’m afraid this is all too predictable coming from you three. But you, Lupin. You’re a prefect. Surely you could have done something to discourage your friends from celebrating your birthday, a month late, I might add, in this fashion. The school—I, personally, and the Headmaster—placed trust in you to uphold and enforce the school rules. And you have sorely disappointed. Twenty points from Gryffindor for each of you three—“ She nodded to Sirius, James and Peter in turn, “—and thirty from you, Remus. You’re lucky I’m not considering revoking your title. And two weekends of detentions with Mr. Filch for all four of you.”

“But Professor McGonagall,” Sirius was putting on his sweetest voice, eyebrows arching towards his hairline, “I admit, James, Pete and I deserve our punishments. But I swear, Remus had no idea that we were planning any of this. That’s why it was a month late. He intercepted and prevented our first surprise. There’s no reason to punish him just because of us. Moony—Rem, I mean—is an excellent prefect. You couldn’t ask for better. And if crime in the school has not plummeted as you might have hoped, then just know that the only reason you have not seen a spike in pranking is because of our dear Prefect Lupin’s efforts. He doesn’t deserve detention. And it’s his birthday, sort of. Please? I’ll do double detention. We all will!”

“I have quidditch practice!” James protested, but then he grunted in pain as Sirius kicked him hard in the shin. Professor McGonagall’s mouth twitched again. This time, when she looked at Remus, her eyes were softer. 

“Is this true, Lupin? That you had no knowledge whatsoever of what these three were planning? That it was kept a secret from you?”

“I specifically asked them not to involve the whole school, Professor. If I had known this was what they were planning, I would not have let them go through with it. I’m not exactly eager for the limelight,” Remus said. Professor McGonagall sighed. 

“Alright. Then Lupin, you don’t have detention. And I’ll only deduct five points from Gryffindor, because of potential negligence in your prefect duties. Please, keep a closer eye on your friends in the future.”

“Yes, Professor,” Remus said, feeling distinctly grateful that Sirius had spoken up for him, “Thank you.” 

“Good. Now, see if you can’t go and finish off breakfast without causing even more havoc.” 

They left to head back to the Great Hall together, though despite the detentions, morale hadn’t suffered much. Sirius’s warm, calloused hand slid into Remus’s, their fingers lacing together, and Remus looked over to meet Sirius’s laughing gray eyes.

“Thank you for saying that back there, Padfoot,” He said quietly, so that James, busy chatting about their chances for the quidditch cup, wouldn’t hear, “I appreciate it.”

“Well, it’s true,” Sirius said with a small shrug, “You didn’t deserve detention.”

“James and Peter didn’t say anything.”

Sirius laughed under his breath, “Well, misery loves company. Speaking of. Minnie didn’t specify separate detentions. Do you think Filch will split me and Prongs up?”

“I think there’s a decent chance he will,” Remus said, laughing too, “I think he’s been given enough examples of what you two are capable of when you’re together.”


End file.
